Fake Movie Friday: Hillbilly Preacher

We watched a movie with a hillbilly preacher in it last night, and then Andrew Dunn gave me the suggestion of that as the title for todays FMF.

Hillbilly Preacher

Travis lives in the small, back woods community known as Greenside. There are 40 people who live there with him, all with different trades and skill sets. Travis is the one who keeps everyone believing, the preacher at their local parish which is the tallest building in the area. The whole community loves Travis, they are a self-sustaining people and have been able to make do without electricity, consumerism and government. 

Travis has a sordid back story, which he always uses to give the community hope, that he was able to rise above his past criminal actions and become the man he is today. He’s been the preacher there for a few years and has never had a problem with any of the people there.

At nights Travis will have terrible dreams (this is a theme with all of my damn movies) reliving the events that put him into jail years ago and his time at war in Iraq. A crime of passion, catching his wife with another man, in a blind rage he killed his wife and the man she was cheating on him with. He wakes up sweating and prays to keep him safe.

A development company, EconoCorp, is planning on leveling the area that Greenside is constructed upon and building an outdoor shopping center. They scout out the land and find the people there, at which time they try to buy all of the people off the land. None of the people want to move. The president of the company, Henry, decides to show up and see what the people are like. He is very nice to everyone and tells them he’s on their side and he wants to try to help them all out. That’s when Travis and him lock eyes, it’s the man he killed years ago that had been sleeping with his wife.

Travis goes straight back to the church and starts to pray. Henry walks in and they have an awkward chat. Henry tells Travis that he’s going to play ball and make everyone in the town leave if they all want to survive. This shopping complex will be built up no matter what, and if there are bodies underneath the concrete then so be it.

The people of the community start to be swayed by the fast talking cretin but Travis steps up and tells the people they shouldn’t settle for what Henry is giving them. This is their community and it’s been their’s forever. Henry tells him he’ll regret this.

The company comes back and the whole town has chained themselves to trees and houses and other things around the community, They put up a fence but the company comes through and knocks it down. They start cutting down the trees even though people are chained to them. The people start to see Henry for who he really is. The tree they are cutting down falls down and crushes the church. The people look horrified but Travis tells them all to be strong. The next tree falls over and kills a couple of citizens. The deconstruction doesn’t stop there and Travis is pissed.

Travis goes into the ruins of the old church and finds the tabernacle, where he pulls out a few hand grenades. He heads into the sacristy and uncovers a whole shit load of munitions. Travis comes out with everything, throwing grenades at the bulldozers, and handing out guns to all of the people in the town who didn’t already have them. Others run to their houses to grab their own guns and bring more munitions to the table to be used against EconoCorp. There are children wielding fire arms, dogs with laser sites, kamikaze ferrets, and eventually the blood bath ends. The town is in shambles but Travis is standing over Henry. Henry asks Travis, “Don’t you want to know how I’m still alive?”

Travis says, “I already know the secrets of resurrection” and fires a final bullett into Henry’s head.

The people start to rebuild, this time with defense in mind, and set up turrets and bunkers and booby trap the surrounding areas, just incase. That night the town is at peace again, they are all sitting around listening to Travis tell stories when suddenly they hear one of the booby traps go off. Everyone goes silent, Travis says “I guess it’s time for round two.” Cut to black

THE END

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