Category Archives: Fake Movie Friday

Sep 15 2017
Fake Movie Friday

Fake Movie Friday Vol 2: Christmas Comes Early

Let’s get ahead on this shit again. Tigs gave me a big long list of titles and I’m ready to rock after how disappointed I am after last week’s movie, which I didn’t even tweet out.

Christmas Comes Early

Ben is a hotshot Wall Street type. He lives in a fancy apartment in the city and does two things, makes money and bangs chicks. What he doesn’t do is care about anyone (off to a great start this week). It’s late November and he’s on the phone with his parents. He tells them that he won’t be able to make it to thanksgiving since he’s too busy. They are sad but things get worse when he then says that he probably won’t make Christmas either. He shrugs it off and heads out for the night. He returns home and passes out. As he does we hear sleigh bells.

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Sep 08 2017
Fake Movie Friday

Fake Movie Friday Vol. 2: Flip It

Going upstate for a mini vacation. Getting this one done before then. I’ve really been slacking.

Flip it

We start with the opening theme song of a reality show circa 2007. The theme song is a play off of Devo’s “Whip It” with the word “whip” replaced with “flip”. Naomi is the star of the show. We see shots of homes before and after their renovations. Naomi talks about how she’s a single mother and how much that helps her to discipline contractors. It cuts to footage of her talking sternly to one of her kids then cuts to her taking the same tone with a roofer. In another cutaway Naomi talks about how she was barely scraping by but saw how much houses started to be sold for on her block and decided to change her career. The final shot is Naomi standing in front of her McMansion holding her littlest with the other three kids standing close by. She says “I’m finally living the American dream” as the camera pulls back.
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Sep 08 2017
Fake Movie Friday

First FMF of the new school year!  I’m pretty beat so this will probably be very short/not good. But a year approaches! Title from the man who puts the give in title giver, Tigs.

Teach the Stars

We open late at night following a dark path up a hill. No one is around and we arrive at a giant telescope housed in an old observatory whose grounds are a bit disheveled. We fly into the rough and find a 60-something man named Martin. He sits looking through the telescope, the only one in the facility. He rubs his eyes a bit tired.

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Sep 01 2017
Fake Movie Friday

Fake Movie Friday Vol 2: My Only Friend

Yet another movie written on a train this week. Title comes from Tigs who knows how Game of Thrones ends. Ask him!

My Only Friend

Black screen and we hear school sounds. A bell, lockers closing, slaps of high fives, and then finally teasing. We fade in but it is not a normal school. We see all sorts of different creatures. Some are furry, some with scales, different amounts of limbs, pretty much a ‘Monsters Inc’ type world. They are all picking on a large, orange, furry creature with the face of a lion. His name is Walter and he doesn’t have any friends.

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Aug 25 2017
Fake Movie Friday

Fake Movie Friday Vol 2: The Case For Causality

*Sorry about the mix up everyone! Hopefully won’t happen again

Been holding off on this one for a long time now. Tigs gave me this gem and we talked about a potential trilogy.

The Case for Causality

We open on flashes of hospital laboratory imagery. A woman screams. A child yells. Security runs through a hall. A man wakes up to a fright in bed as his the alarm in the dream syncs up with the alarm in his bedroom. He looks at the alarm and sees a bluish outline of himself setting the alarm and putting it back down. He rubs his eyes looking like he has a headache. Around the room we see an outline of him, closing the door, shutting off the light folding clothes. He shuts his eyes hard and takes several deep breaths. He opens his eyes slowly and the visions are gone. This is Arthur.

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Aug 18 2017
Fake Movie Friday

Fake Movie Friday Vol 2- Lone Banana

This title comes from Julianne last night at Pig Pile. It’s origin from a stand ups set has to do with masturbating creativity. Let’s see what sort of movie comes from that fact.

Lone Banana

We open in an office building and people are talking about the previous weekend’s Halloween parties and such. They share pictures and stories until we hear the chime of an elevator and a silence comes over the office. The camera turns and we see a man walking through in a banana costume. He sits at his desk, puts his things down and gets to work.

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Aug 11 2017
Fake Movie Friday

Fake Movie Friday Vol 2: Damsels Without Distress

I’ve been at home nursing a foot injury for a few days and have maybe said 10 words out loud in the past 5 days. Let’s see if that translates well to paper. Title from Tigs of course.

Damsels Without Distress

We open with a knight getting sent out by a king. It’s a fancy ceremony naming him a hero of the realm and such. We see a montage of him suiting up and mounting a beautiful horse. He rides out into the forest. The trees and terrain start to get darker and scarier. He fights some beasts, real and fantastic, as he travels. He approaches a dark tower and makes a speech about saving the princesses. He is quickly killed. We cut to the top of the tower where 4 women sit in a cell. One shouts out the window “Great job asshole!”

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Aug 04 2017
Fake Movie Friday

Fake Movie Friday Vol 2: Connected

Starting this on the previous Friday because I’m a FMF machine. Guess where this title came from? (The answer is Tigs)

Connected

Jake is riding high. He’s out with some friends at a bar. They are celebrating his engagement as well as his promotion. Things are going great. He just put a down payment on a house. He’s drinking pretty heavily and we start jumping ahead, skipping moments. We jump into a moment where he his punching someone in the face as the crowd gasps. His friends take him out of the bar and he gets put in a cab. A bouncer goes to one of his friends, “You’re man fucked up. That dude is connected.”

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Jul 28 2017
Fake Movie Friday

Fake Movie Friday Vol 2: Another Destiny

I love this getting ahead with movies thing. May Vol 2 never end! Title from the great and powerful Tigs.

Another Destiny

We open in a meadow at dusk. A king and queen bring a baby up to a great willow tree where an old woman stands. In voiceover our main character Jodie, currently the newborn, talks about how everyone in their land has a destiny that they are assigned when they are born. They must follow it. Sadly hers was just to birth the next great generation of kings. We get the sense that something is a bit off during this ceremony though. I WONDER WHAT THE TWIST COULD BE BASED ON THE TITLE?!

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Jul 21 2017
Fake Movie Friday

Fake Movie Friday Vol 2: Inner Workings

So I thought I started this two weeks early but then I forgot to ask for a title at Pig Pile last night. Tigs sent me a lot of vague titles, which are the best to think over and put together.

Inner Workings

A young boy, Robbie, plays inside. His mother sternly asks him to go outside. He is being too loud and his father is trying to sleep. He heads out to play looking a bit sad. A truck approaches and two men unload a tall covered object and head towards his door. He runs behind them and his mother tells him to stay out of the way. He slowly moves around the corner trying to see what it is as he hears his mother talking to his dad telling her that the things from his father’s estate have arrived commenting it took them long enough since the funeral was last week. Robbie comes around the corner to find a huge, beautiful, and intricate grandfather clock.

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